The Lie of “I Can’t” vs. the Power of “I Choose Not To”
Language is powerful. The words we use shape our reality, influence our actions, and define our personal narrative. Two phrases that seem similar but carry vastly different implications are: “I can’t” and “I choose not to.” While one suggests helplessness, the other asserts control. Understanding the difference between the two can transform how we approach challenges, responsibilities, and personal growth.
The Limiting Nature of “I Can’t”
Saying “I can’t” is often an unconscious act of self-limitation. It suggests an external force is preventing us from taking action, rather than acknowledging our role in the decision. Consider these examples:
- “I can’t start my own business.”
- “I can’t find time to exercise.”
- “I can’t ever take a good photo.”
Each of these statements implies that the ability to act is out of our hands, dictated by circumstances or innate limitations. However, in most cases, “I can’t” is not a statement of truth but of belief. It is a psychological barrier rather than a factual one. By framing a situation as something beyond our control, we relinquish responsibility and avoid making difficult but empowering choices.
The Strength in “I Choose Not To”
On the other hand, saying “I choose not to” acknowledges agency. It transforms a passive limitation into an active decision. Let’s revisit those same statements:
- “I choose not to start my own business because I prefer financial stability.”
- “I choose not to exercise because I prioritize other activities.”
- “I choose not to learn how to use my camera because I’m not comfortable/ready yet.”
These statements shift the perspective. They remove the illusion of powerlessness and replace it with conscious choice. By acknowledging that we are making a decision—rather than being subject to invisible constraints—we open the door to growth. If we ever want to change, we know it is within our power.
Why This Distinction Matters
- Empowerment – When we recognize our choices, we take ownership of our lives. Instead of blaming circumstances, we take responsibility for the paths we take.
- Honesty – Saying “I choose not to” forces us to be honest about our priorities. It helps us evaluate whether our choices align with our goals and values.
- Growth Mindset – Recognizing that most “I can’t” statements are actually choices allows us to challenge self-imposed limits and develop new skills and habits.
- Respect from Others – When we say “I choose not to,” we communicate clarity and decisiveness. This garners respect because people appreciate honesty over excuses.
Breaking Free from “I Can’t”
The next time you catch yourself saying “I can’t,” pause and reframe it as a choice. If you truly believe something is beyond your ability, ask yourself:
- Is this a real limitation, or is it something I haven’t prioritized?
- If I had to do this, how would I go about it?
- Am I willing to accept the consequences of not doing it?
By making this simple shift, you reclaim control over your actions, your mindset, and ultimately, your future. The words we use matter—so let’s choose them wisely.
What does this have to do with Photography?!
Great question! Over the years I have met many people who repeatedly state ” I just can’t take a good picture” or “I am not creative”. Sound familiar? For many reading this article it will. You now know the statements of “I can’t” and “I am not” are lies. The truth is, much like the choice I made regarding construction: I haven’t chosen to.
Which brings us to an all important realization around the power to choose that you have. I don’t want the “I can’t” or “I am not” to sit on your shoulder for the rest of your life. They are self defeating and can become heavy weights to carry. Make a Choice:
If creativity is not a current strength of yours and upon analysis it just isn’t all that important for the goals in your life to make you happy I would encourage you to say: I choose not to develop my creativity but rather surround myself by people who are for the situations that is needed in my life.
If on the other hand, you feel you aren’t creative (feelings can lie by the way), and you have a deep yearning to change that, then please CHOOSE to say: I am going to develop my creativity by committing to a plan that will do that. It IS POSSIBLE!
The last big encouragement I would give you is for that plan and comes out of an abundance of life experience: DON”T ATTEMPT A PLAN IN ISOLATION.
Much like a choice to delegate creativity by surrounding ourselves with people who are, developing any skill/trait in life is best done in community. Engage on a regular basis with people who you admire for being creative. They can give you great advice on developing yours and play the all important role of being your accountability partner to actually take the steps needed to get there.
At Learn Photography Canada we provide both the in person, hands-on teaching and supportive community that can help you overcome any false beliefs like “I can’t” or “I am not”.
If you don’t want to be.. that’s cool just say it loud and clear. If you do want to be but false beliefs have been limiting your growth then we need to talk. The teaching environment we create is the #BESTSTART to photography and will help you break through to accomplish goals you didn’t think were possible. We offer photography courses from Beginner to full certification. Check out the workshops and bundles available on this site or call us at 1.888.734.2641. We LOVE helping people crash through any false beliefs they hold : O ) – David @ Learn Photography Canada